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In 2011, I started teaching in a two-way dual language immersion school for the first time. It was a new school, a new city (Austin, TX), new curriculum, and though I had always taught in Spanish prior to that, this was the first time I was switching students with another teacher (students did a half-day with the Engilsh immersion teacher and a half-day with the Spanish immersion teacher) and had to work and coordinate with someone else who had their own way of doing things. It was a lot of firsts, and this year was almost (emphasis on almost) as hard for me as my first year teaching at all.

However, I was a lot more versed in parental relationships by that time, and I leaned on that a lot with handwritten notes home and calls home after school. (I still owned a flip phone at this time, so this was old school. I had no nearly the tools available to connect with parents as there are today).

One student, Mariana (not her real name), was extremely bright and a fast learner, but there were little behaviors that I could tell could become a big problem over time, mostly involving her relationships with other girls and her response to corrections by me. I lacked a lot of confidence in my new setting and made a lot of mistakes, but what I did do well was to make sure to share with her mom all of the wonderful things about Mariana, that were true, investing in that relationship should things become more challenging down the line.

Then one day, after returning from an absence from school, Mariana presented me with a doctor’s note. When I looked at it closer, I could see that the date had been changed from not yesterday to yesterday. This wasn’t the work of a 6-year-old, and this is the moment where I needed to call on the relationship seeds I had planted with mom.

Mariana’s mom came to school that week for something unrelated, and I brought her into my classroom while the class was in Specials and broached the topic of the changed date on the note. Mom confessed she had changed it and in reality had taken Mariana out for a fun day on the town because there had been a lot of personal family stresses, and she wanted Mariana to have a day without any stress.

Ok, I said. I understand why you wanted Mariana to have a day free from stress and to bond with her. Let’s set aside the fact that she missed a day of school for a second, and just look at the doctor’s note you sent her to school with. What message are you sending to Mariana about honesty? At 6-years-old, if Mariana lies, it probably won’t be that high-stakes or even that well-executed. But fast-forward to when she is 16. What will her honesty be worth at that age? What will the stakes be then if she has learned that dishonesty is acceptable?

I felt quite nervous having this conversation. I was still in my mid-twenties and had no kids. Who was I to be saying this to mom? She easily could have taken it personally and been offended. But instead, mom nodded slowly. “You’re right. I shouldn’t have lied. I shouldn’t have set that example for Mariana."

Though up to then I wouldn’t say there was anything stand-out about my relationship with Mariana’s mom, from that moment on, she opened up about a lot of private details that were relevant for me to know as Mariana’s teacher. She volunteered to chaperone on field trips, she invited me to Mariana’s birthday party, she talked to me as a thought-partner when trying to address something difficult with Mariana at home. This continued the next year, too, when I looped with Mariana’s class. After I was no longer her daughter’s teacher, we even met up for lunch a couple times as friends, and are in touch occasionally to this day.
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But if I look back to what made that turning point conversation more likely to go well (not to take away from mom’s incredible grace and maturity in that moment), the small things in the beginning were much more important than they originally appeared. It hadn’t taken a huge lift: just showing in small ways that I noticed the positive things about her daughter.

First, Make a copy of this Spanish Notes Bank. Use it as-is or add to it over time as you learn new phrases or get help from others! Keep this somewhere easily accessible so you can pull it out in a pinch to quickly jot down that message to the parent.

Note that the notes were written by me (a human), and not Google Translate. Thus -- you can be confident in these messages. ;-)
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Then, sign up for the 4-week bite-sized Relationship-Building Challenge to build trust and rapport with your Spanish-speaking parents now, so you and your students can look back on a more successful, enjoyable, and meaningful year later.

If you have Spanish-speaking families, but not a lot of Spanish-speakers on staff, and you would like to be able to welcome and include families with more warmth, Spanish for Educators is the fun and effective answer to your problem.

Classes include Spanish for Office Professionals, Spanish for Teachers, Spanish for Nurses & Counselors as well as Spanish for Relationship-Building, which is suitable for staff in any number of roles.

A Spanish for Educators is the only professional Spanish language course that focuses on the most frequent role-specific exchanges between staff and family, and that addresses the barriers that often prevent adult educators from using the language they learn in a class setting, such as: fear of making mistakes and appearing unprofessional, fear of starting a conversation, and overwhelming jobs that make studying unfeasible.
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If you want to learn more about practical role- or purpose-focused Spanish courses, just book a free no-pressure call to learn more.

Two posts ago, I shared my two favorite one-liners to use when someone tries to funnel all school communications through one staff member, not because it is their actual job, but because a) that staff member speaks the language, or b) that is the ELL teacher, and therefore everything multilingual is put in their sphere without any more nuanced consideration.

​Today, I want to address the issue if you are actively trying to change this practice, but the very staff member who is used as a funnel is sabotaging your efforts because they like being the funnel. They like the close relationships with families, and they believe they are being helpful. How do you get that person to stop old habits and get on board your communication equity train?

Part of the challenge of building, fixing, or improving multilingual communication systems is that leaders tasked with the work are also tasked with a gazillion other high-priority things. Hello, public education. Having been in these shoes before, I know viscerally how much time and energy it takes to tackle just this one issue of communication equity. I also know it can be done, and I have a replicable framework to do it.

If you know this is a problem at your school or district, let's get you some help. 
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1. ​Schedule time to chat with me.
2. Show up to our call.
3. Leave with a support plan that fits your time, capacity, and budget. 

P.S. Options for support include one-off PD for leaders or teachers, group coaching, one-on-one coaching, and done-for-you consulting. Let's talk!

Book a call if you believe the same.